"Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage." Anais Nin

Art Link Letter

whew.  information overload.  I had a curious reaction today...I sat down at the Big National Bookstore to read magazines and the following article really moved me. In this month's Wired, there's an article by Dan PInk (promised to be posted online by July 11th) about the two types of creative genius.  He profiles an economist with the inquisitive nature of a researcher and an eye for art who looked into how artists produce work througout their life. Said researcher examined famous artists, tracking their most famous  works in the context of their body of work. I wish I remembered what his name was. I'd tell you if I did.

What he found was two distinct personality types  of creative geniuses. Those whose inspiration comes early...say before 30, and their ideas revolutionize the field, only to have later works not as highly praised (Jasper Johns). And those who experiment all their lives, slow and steady,  and come up with equally revolutionary work,  just later in life (jackson Pollack).  He studied many visual artists, and I don't have the article in front of me to reference, but it was sooo cool.

why did this resonate with me? Because struggling to find my artistic vision at 40 is difficult. I begin to ask all those "why" questions that get me nowhere. I am where I am and I'm grateful to be here. I do worry about creating a vibrant, satisfying  body of work in this life.  I do not strive to be revolutionary or famous, but definitely want to make a unique mark in society in general and art specifically.  The mere recognition that many artists take years to find their "greatest work" through painstaking experimentation encourages me.

I also struggle with the idea of going back to school. While I've pretty much figured out that I would balk at a structured program, as time goes by my list of "things to learn" grows longer. I also realize, after looking at results of juried shows, how far I have to go to develop a unique voice.  I need to be pushed in ways I may not be able to push myself.

Will Wendy the life coach be able to do this? Maybe...I meet with her in a couple of weeks. She doesn't have to know good art to know how to push me out of my comfort zone. At least I don't think so. We shall see.

So I am drawn to school still. Get off my ass and take a class? yeah, i know. I'm going...i'm going.

Posted by: brutallycurious at June 28, 2006 17:41 | link | comments (1)
art , finding my own rhythm, wendy the life coach

The Wild Woman nature

"Creativity is not a solitary movement. That is its power. Whatever is touched by it, whoever hears it, sees it, senses it, knows it, is fed. That is why beholding someone else's creative word, image, idea, fills us up, inspires us to our own creative work...

 For  this reason, a woman's creative ability is her most valuable asset, for it gives outwardly and it feeds her inwardly at every level: psychic, spiritual, mental, emotive, and economic. The wild nature pours out endless possibilities, acts as birth channel, invigorates, slakes thirst, satiates our hunger for the deep and wild life."

Women Who Run With the Wolves, Clarissa Pinkola Estes,Ph.D.,  p. 323. Italics mine.

 

I read this book over and over. It's a difficult read filled with myths, archetypes, Jungian ideas. But it delves deep into the psyche of women, revealing and reveling in their instinctual knowing, their soul's truths. It reminds me to trust what is deep within, to embrace, dance with and trust the creativity that rises from wihin.

 

Posted by: brutallycurious at June 27, 2006 12:12 | link | comments (1)
creation, possibilities, authenticity

New stuff

Woohoo.  Singing Arrow, a computer geek by day, started working with me this weekend on building my website. I am very excited.
I also, though, have just registerd with a new website, ArtistSites.org.  It just launched, but it looks like it will be a cool place for artists to showcase their work. My page is sparse, but they will be adding more functionality soon.
Which leads me to my next task...an artist's bio and statement. It has been on my to-do list for a while....now it is imperative. A bit daunting, but I"m going to tackle it this week.

and, oh by the way, I did go shoot last Thursday. I had a lot of fun. To satiate the ego, I stopped at the coffee shop on the way...we all had a good laugh that I was buying both a smoothie and a large coffee. I told the baristas their next assignment was to come up with a smoothie and caffeine booster in one drink....dairy free please. Yeah...lol. They'll get right on that.

Posted by: brutallycurious at June 26, 2006 12:06 | link | comments (1)

damn

So, if American Girl can admit she thinks she could die from  a panic attack, then I can admit I feel possessed by an alternate personality at times. Sometimes the artistic urges in me take over when I had perfectly wonderful, logical plans in place. I hate this!  I love it, but I hate it, too.
Here I sit, minding my own business, contemplating a nap because it's been a busy week, when I am suddenly consumed with an idea to go shoot.
I argue..
My head:  what, now?? It's like, 100 degrees outside and humid. No..let's do it in the morning when I'm fresh and it's cooler.
My artist: Ohh, come on!!! It'll be fun..I wanna go now. Let's go check out that lab on 10th street and take those rolls of film sitting in the kitchen. I can find cool people to take pictures of !!!
My head: noooooo! I'm tired..i wanna take a nap.. i'm hungry too.
My artist: Pllleeeeeeeze. It'll be fun. wear your tennies in case we trespass on some weedy lot to find old railcars....(like we did last year when  you wore flip-flops, dufus).
My head: shit. okay. I can't say no when you want to go shoot. But I'm getting a smoothie first!!

Posted by: brutallycurious at June 22, 2006 16:37 | link | comments (4)

Sanctuary

I discovered a new artist on iTunes today ....Teitur. He has been called a cross between Paul Simon and Bob Dylan. That seems pretty accurate to me. His style is very mellow, but introspective and original.

My day has been mellow and introspective. I feel the fear of starting something big. I feel the fear of trusting myself, trusting the Universe...just trusting that I'm not going to fall on my face as an artist. Even if I do it's okay. I am okay no matter what happens to me professionally, and I understand perceived "failures" are essential and helpful to my artistic evolution.

Yet  I'm afraid. I'd like to say it doesn't slow me down, but it does. I can go days and weeks without moving through whatever scares me at the moment. I have made some very real progress on things that used to hinder me socially, and I'm  hoping I can translate that into my artistic life. I often wonder how other artists move through the obstacles both real and imagined.

Here is where I could use an enduring relationship with another artist to discuss such things. This is a downside to not being in a structured art program. Yes, I do very well with my own research and use it to motivate and inspire me. Sometimes it isn't enough.  I want someone to identify with my obstacles and encourage me through them. I have done better lately at meeting other artists...but no one yet who can become part of my life with whom I can form a mutally beneficial supportive friendship.

For now, I am going to rely on my already supportive husband, therapist, and Life Coach. I still have mixed feelings about the LIfe Coach, but i see that she is good for me and worth every penny. She scares me too. Unlike a therapist, she is going to ask me my goals, then coach me into making them happen. Yes, yes. Exactly what I just said I wanted and needed. The irony is not lost on me. Maybe that's why I'm so amibivalent.   WIth her help, I have no excuses. I have all the help I want to accomplish this show.

This show that has no venue yet. Despite the fear, I have this inner calm that says I am developing a good show, and it will end up somewhere. It will happen. So I cling to that for now. Breathe in, breathe out. It will all be okay.

So...here goes. I realized Saturday night that my ideas for a show have been motivated by a desire to re-create  my childhood religious experience. I am redefining what "church" means to me. I am creating a new experience of "sanctuary" .  The pictures that evoke God for me will be hung in a space with constant music that moves my soul, and create an atmosphere of mediation and beauty. That's the idea. The power in it is that I understand now what drives me.

The "Church" as we know it failed me in childhood on many levels. But where it succeeded was in helping me connect my emotions with God...moving me into my spirit. My dad was the music minister, and a lot of that music was just awful and maudlin, but I can't deny that it taught me to find god through my emotions. I also came away with an appreciation of the value of a  dedicated space in which to acknowledge and be with the Divine, whether it be under a tree, by the river, in a cathedral, or in a gallery.

That seems to be where I'm headed...not maudlin, but an authentic experience of the Divine in a new way. The magic is in the details.  The word itself...sanctuary...moves me.

I was talking to Dave Saturday night about his new album he is working on. He was a little concerned because some of the cuts are such different styles. But I offered him a little wisdom I gained, of all places, from interior decorating....
If you love it and it reflects your true self, it will all work together, regardless of the genre.  There will be a common thread of your soul in it all.

That's how I feel about this work. Somehow it will all work, because it will all reflect my soul. I have been given little pieces here and there...how to mount this one, how to frame that one, which pieces work and which don't. I will have to continue to trust that what speaks to me will all work together.

"To thine own self be true..."

Posted by: brutallycurious at June 19, 2006 21:48 | link | comments (2)
emotions, space, god , dave, authenticity, sanctuary